In choosing someone to start a relationship with, a sense of humor is a common trait that people usually look for. You want someone who is a delight to be with. A person who loves to laugh can also make  grim situations better. A recent study indicated that couples who laugh together had longer lasting relationships. This is another great reason to choose a jolly person as a lifelong mate. Yet, for it to truly benefit your relationship, couples need to know the proper way of using humor. The following pointers can serve as guides:

Humor should not ridicule one another.

While it is important to make laughter an integral part of your relationship, you should also examine the things that you are laughing about. Humor can become a source of conflict rather than a way to bond if it is often geared at the expense of one another. Teasing is only fun if it is done with sensitivity to the feelings of others. As a couple who respects each other, it is not healthy to ridicule one another just for the sake of humor. Be careful so that your jokes, trivia, and anecdotes do not sound like an attack on one’s beliefs, culture, or physical appearance. Remember that humor should uplift each other as it brings out good emotions, rather than being used to put someone down.

Humor should know proper timing.

Even with good intentions, there are moments when it is simply not acceptable to joke around, especially after someone experiences a very painful event. A person with a healthy sense of humor has the ability to empathize with others, so he or she would not make an unfortunate situation (especially if it happened very recently) a laughing matter. Bear in mind that good humor should have the ability to heal, not rub salt into the wound. In a relationship, it is essential to understand the right moments when humor can pull you closer rather than set you apart.

Humor should not be used to fake emotions.

While it is typical for emotions to feel like a rollercoaster for people in a relationship, not everyone would choose to address the issues outright. Some use humor to hide their real feelings rather than discuss them with their partners. This may be done to avoid conflicts and arguments. However, since honesty is always a crucial factor in making any relationship work, joking around to cover up your real emotions can further hurt you in the long run. To have a truly harmonious union, there are issues that couples need to sort out even when they are unpleasant to discuss.

No one wants to feel miserable, so almost everyone would choose a person who loves to laugh rather than someone who is always frowning. Just don’t forget that even a positive thing such as a good sense of humor has limits too.